My biggest fear for the future was that I wasn't going to be a good mom because kids were just big question marks. I swear babies could see right through me...them and horses. haha
I've officially been a full time mom for over a year now and I've gone through every emotion from "this is so fun" to "what do I do with another full day" to "how do people have multiples?"
Along that time frame I was also trying to get painting commissions or be a private art teacher. I didn't get any business. None. I also applied to be an art teacher for Michaels crafts and that didn't happen. I applied for VIPKID and am still able to do a second interview but it hasn't felt right. Either way I have determined bringing an income is not what I'm supposed to do. Being a mom is. For me, that's what I'm supposed to do.
Something clicked in my mind a few days ago to help with this.
I determined that if I was to be a full time mom then I should embrace it, but I felt like someone had turned an invisible key inside me and that's what made me feel confident about life now.
So I seek every opportunity to be a homemaker. My goal is to provide a haven for my family but physically and spiritually. I know it's not a popular path and like I said a day or so ago when you ask pinterest for ideas on homemaking its top 2 hits are "work from home part time" and make your own essential oils". Even pinterest is trying to make this life all about making money.
I don't like to say I'm a stay at home mom, because I like to be out with people doing soul enriching things. That's what I want for Lucy. Home is our place to relax and rest and rejuvenate.
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